Many people try to detect love in a single glance, compliment or message, especially when they already feel attracted to someone. Yet it is far more useful to pay attention to a person’s behavior over time rather than relying on isolated romantic gestures.
Ukrainian psychologist Vitalii Storcheusov says the key sign of genuine romantic feelings is that a person consistently moves toward you. He makes an effort to become closer, even when doing so requires stepping outside his comfort zone or changing his usual routines.
Main sign of real interest
If a man is genuinely interested, it will show not only in his words but also in stable, proactive behavior. According to Storcheusov, a mature person experiencing attraction, infatuation, love or passion will try to reduce the distance and look for ways to become part of your life.
It can be helpful to observe how communication develops over weeks or months, particularly when you are apart. Regular contact, meaningful conversations and a clear desire to make time for you usually indicate a conscious choice to maintain the connection.
His behavior when he is busy can also be revealing. If he cannot respond immediately but calls back when he has the opportunity, it suggests that he values the connection. Consistent small actions can say more about his feelings than dramatic declarations.
From attraction to conscious love
Storcheusov emphasizes that sympathy, infatuation, love and passion are related but distinct emotional states. Sympathy often develops through communication, when someone senses that certain psychological or physical needs could be met with another person, ranging from friendly interest to more intimate attraction.
The next stage may be infatuation, characterized by intense emotions when two people are together. This phase is strongly associated with the release of neurotransmitters in the brain, which is why being close to someone can feel particularly exciting and almost electrifying.
However, infatuation alone does not guarantee a lasting relationship. Over time, partners become accustomed to one another, some needs are satisfied and the initial emotional intensity may diminish. Without deeper foundations, the bond can weaken as the early chemistry fades.
Love in a psychological sense is an emotional attachment that can be especially powerful when combined with passion. Yet attachment alone may not be enough to sustain a couple through serious difficulties, as feelings can change under stress or during conflict.
The psychologist therefore distinguishes another level: love as a conscious choice. It involves not only emotion but an emotionally driven decision that includes responsibility, dialogue and a willingness to remain together even when doing so becomes uncomfortable.
In such a partnership, people are not only lovers but also close allies and friends. They can communicate openly, negotiate, support one another through crises and repeatedly choose each other despite temptations or external pressures.
How to test his sincerity
At the beginning of a relationship, it can be difficult to determine how serious a man’s intentions are. Storcheusov notes that infatuation can sometimes resemble obsession, particularly when someone tries to obtain the object of his interest at any cost and disregards boundaries.
Time can serve as an important filter in these situations. One practical indicator may be refusing intimate contact early in the relationship. If, after hearing a clear no, he continues communicating respectfully and maintaining closeness, his response can offer insight into his motives.
According to Storcheusov, longer-term interaction reveals whether a person is driven primarily by emotion and passion or has made a deeper decision to remain close. A rapid loss of interest following sexual refusal may indicate that desire rather than love was the main motivation.
What to watch at the start
Rather than rushing to label a man’s behavior as love during the first weeks of dating, it can be more useful to observe what kind of person he is, which values guide him and how he responds when something goes wrong or plans fall apart.
Pay attention to whether he can listen, discuss disagreements calmly and remain present during difficult moments. These qualities can matter far more for long-term happiness than spectacular romantic gestures or intense early passion.
A man may demonstrate strong desire and speak constantly about his feelings while still being unprepared for a healthy, stable partnership. Emotional fireworks do not automatically mean that someone can handle routine, responsibility or everyday conflict.
Storcheusov argues that the goal should not be to pursue an idealized love story at any cost. More important is finding an emotionally stable, compatible partner who will genuinely be there, while love as a deep and mutual choice remains something not everyone experiences.
Vitalii Storcheusov is a practicing psychologist specializing in anxiety, conflict resolution and self-esteem issues. He is trained in practical psychology and incorporates elements of cognitive behavioral therapy and cross-cultural positive psychotherapy into his work with clients.
